Counselor's Corner

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How to Give Kids Effective Instructions 
 
EN ESPAÑOL 

The first step to harmony is teaching your child to listen and follow directions 

One of the most important keys to minimizing problem behavior is making sure that kids are getting the message you’re trying to send. When it comes to parenting, sometimes the way instructions are given can be just as important as what you’re trying to communicate. 

Here are ways to present information to your children to make it more likely that they’ll hear you, and comply: 

• Be direct. Make statements rather than asking questions: “Please sit down,” as opposed to “Are you ready to get out your homework?”
• Be close. Give instructions when you are near the child, rather than calling out from across the room.
• Use clear and specific commands. Instead of “Go ahead,” say, “Please go start your reading assignment.”
• Give age-appropriate instructions. Speak to your child at a level he will understand. If your child is younger, keep things simple and use words you know he knows: “Please pick up the ball.” With older children, who are so often keenly aware of not being “babies anymore” it’s important to be clear without being patronizing.
• Give instructions one at a time. Especially for kids who have attention challenges, try to avoid giving a series of instructions: “Please put on your sneakers, get your lunch off the kitchen counter, and meet me in the front hall.”
• Keep explanations simple. Giving a rationale can increase the likelihood children will listen to a command, but not if the commands gets lost in it. For instance: “Go get your coat on because it’s raining and I don’t want you to catch a cold.” Instead, try: “It’s raining and I don’t want you to catch a cold. Go get your coat on.”
• Give kids time to process. After you give an instruction, wait a few seconds, without repeating what you said. Children then learn to listen to calm instructions given once rather than learning that they don’t need to listen because the instructions will be repeated. Watching and waiting also helps keep adults from doing what we’ve requested of our kids for them. 

Following Directions Activities that Anyone Can Learn From: 

• Teacher Says 
  • Just like you would play Simon Says, you can play “Teacher Says!” 
• Word Vault Pro has made this game REALLLLLY easy for you!
  • You stand facing the children with the app opened to the Following Directions screen. Here you can choose 1 step, 2 step, 3 step or 4 step directions, as well as choose between adult or child directions.
  • (I practiced doing the adult 4-step directions all by myself tonight and I must admit it was challenging and fun. Glad someone didn’t walk in while I was saying actors names and patting my head!)
  • The app also allows you to take data while you play.
  • With the list of your targeted directions in your hand, you can say “Teacher Says _______.”
  • Try to catch them doing an action when you don’t say “Teacher Says” first! 
• Ordering Objects
  • Materials: Red, Blue, Yellow and Green Crayon
  • Line up the crayons on the table in front of the student.
  • Ask them to manipulate the crayons based on your directions.
  • For one step directions, say simple things like “Move the blue crayon.” “Touch the red crayon.” or ask them to make shapes such as “Make a T using the crayons.”
  • For two step directions, you might say “Move the green crayon to the front.” “Move the yellow crayon to second place.” “Move the crayon in first place to third place.”
  • You can get as advanced as you want, saying things like “Move the green crayon to third place and the last crayon to first place.”
• Real Life Practice
  • Children who have difficulty following directions will often become lost during class-guided activities throughout the school day.
  • This can be overwhelming and cause them to fall further behind.
  • If you have children in your caseload that are having difficulty following directions in context, it is very important to make the teacher aware of this.
  • Have the child move to the front of the classroom and ask the teacher to give them subtle reminders and extra cues about tasks throughout the day. 
  • It is important to practice following directions in a classroom setting.
  • Role play teacher/student with them in the therapy room.
  • You can pretend to be the teacher first, and do real-life tasks that they may encounter throughout the day. You can also give the child the list of instructions and they can pretend to be YOUR teacher. Sometimes switching roles is really beneficial; it allows the child to see things from the teacher's perspective.
  • You can even pretend to be a student that isn’t following the directions and have them encourage and remind you.
  • Below is a list of things that a teacher might ask of a student. Practice having them follow your directions as you move at a teacher’s pace.
  1. Take a pencil from your backpack and sharpen it. Then write your name at the top of the page.[Text Wrapping Break]
  2. Get a yellow, red, and blue crayon from the crayola box. Draw your favorite bug using those colors.[Text Wrapping Break]
  3. Fold your paper in half the long way, and then fold it in half again. Write your first and last name on the front of the folded paper. [Text Wrapping Break]
  4. Take the paper  you have been working on and put it in your backpack. Then come back to your table and wait quietly. I don’t want anything on  your desk. [Text Wrapping Break]
  5. Number your paper 1-5. Write five words beginning with /b/. Then bring your paper to me.  

You can add to/change this list of instructions to make it appropriate for your students.  This is a generic list I made for 1st grade on up.  This type of therapy for following directions would be easy to incorporate into other therapies for articulation, language, etc.  You can say something like “Take the list of /r/ words from your back back and read the first ten out loud.”  This way you are addressing following directions in context as well as addressing other therapy the child needs. 

It’s great to incorporate REAL LIFE therapy. 

Ms. Espeleta
EC-1st grade Counselor

Secondary

Hello, Today I am sharing an article from  Karyn Santl, Extension educator in University of Minnesota. It is about building skills to interrupt bias, something that goes beyond our role as parents, educators and citizens. I hope you find it interesting.  
- Ms. Mora.  

Building skills to interrupt bias 

blog-youth-development-insight.extension.umn.edu/2022/07/building-skills-to-interrupt-bias.html 
By Karyn Santl 

Becoming anti-racist or an ally of differently abled persons is an ongoing learning and growth process. One action you can take is to build skills to interrupt biases or stereotypes when you see them. Interruptions are often an attempt to stop a present or future harmful behavior, model respectful words and actions, create a safe space, advocate for those oppressed by the behavior, and support those being harmed. Interrupting oppressive and biased actions and words is a form of allyship. It shows you care for and want people to be safe.  

Youth workers can role model interrupting biases as well as teach skills to interrupt. Two resources I have found helpful in increasing my skills in this area are Speak Up at School by Learning for Justice, and Toolkit for Interrupting Oppression by the Oregon Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence.  

The Speak Up at School guide gives these strategies to use in the moment when harmful words or actions are taking place:   

1. Interrupt. Speak up against every biased remark or action. 
2. Question. Use simple, exploratory questions such as, "Why do you say that?" "What do you mean?" or "Tell me more." 
3. Educate. Explain why the term or phrase is offensive. 
4. Echo. Be the second or third person to speak up.   

I have found helpful examples of possible interruptions from the Interrupting Oppression Toolkit. Here are a few I have used:         

• Ask for clarity. "By 'crazy' do you mean awesome? Unexpected? Wrong?" 
• Voice your values. "Please refrain from using ableist language like dumb and lame." 
• Appeal to a sense of shared humanity. "How would that person or someone from that group feel if they heard you?" 
• Fall back on rules or policies. "This is a place where it is not ok to use violent language."   

I am still sometimes in shock and don’t say something when I hear biased language, but I am working on that and increasing the tools I have ready to interrupt. What phrases or tools do you use to interrupt bias?